Sat in the hairdressers doing ‘old school f@#$ all’ for the first time in a very long time, I realise why I’ve been feeling so crappy this week and why my poor husband has been getting in the neck…I’m emotionally over it!
Lately, I’ve seen and heard everywhere the idea being a full time mum is the easy option; the ‘sometimes I wish I could give up work and be at stay at home mum and bake’ idea. Yes, I spend most of my week at play-dates, baby groups or taking walks down the beach. Sounds completely idyllic and I’m not complaining, I know how lucky I am, but this way of life has its hidden issues.
Sitting in the salon, I’m still rocking the chair as if I’m holding a sleeping baby! It’s completely passed me by that I’ve not eaten or even had a cup of tea! There is always someone who needs your attention and you are always ‘on’; its a 24/7 job. Then there’s the guilt: at the sinking feeling you get when you hear your baby wake from a nap and you have literally just sat down for 5 minutes peace; at the frustration you feel when the baby is asleep and now you have to clean up from dinner; at the annoyance you feel because you know you have it so good and are lucky to have the chance to stay at home!
It is emotionally draining and the wise woman knows that if you don’t look after yourself and acknowledge your emotions, everything else can quickly go downhill! So, wise woman…what am I supposed to do!
Write a blog and moan about it 😉 Turn the phone off and have a shower with the door locked and without singing the ‘Wheels on the Bus! Spend a ridiculous amount of money on my hair! Tell my husband to make his own damn cup of tea (don’t worry, I won’t go that far)!
I’m going to be selfish once in a while, I’m going to remember to look after myself. I’m going to sit here and keep doing nothing while my lovely hairdresser gives me the best head massage and I’m not going to feel guilty about having an hour off !
MammaKnows…is off the grid!